Thank You

Dear Baby Waider + Little Brother Too,

You will mostly likely remember the morning of 2/21/19. It was the morning that we lost our dear Mia after being our faithful family dog for 14 years. I often turn to writing to help me stop a tape from playing over and over in my mind. I show I'm old because I said "tape" and you don't even know what that is. I keep reliving the last few hours of Mia's life. Most likely because I am afraid if I don't keep playing it over and over I will forget it. Maybe my mind is trying to find a way to change the outcome. If I think about it long enough it'll change and maybe Mia will still be here. Does that sound crazy? I am sure it does. It's about to sound a whole lot crazier. Wednesday afternoon was much like any other afternoon. We stayed at school and worked a bit then came home. The strange part was that Mia wasn't inside when we got home. She was outside. She was laying in the snow and when I tried to get her in she just stayed out there. I thought it was strange but carried on with preparing dinner and getting all the things done for the evening routine. It seemed odd to not have her in the kitchen watching my every move while I cooked and while we ate. But she just wasn't there. She finally came in right before you two went to bed, but  she was trembling on the couch and seemed cold. During bath time she asked to go out again which was actually the most normal thing she did all night. She typically was a constant movement from going in and out and out and in several times an hour. She usually didn't stay out very long. It was slightly warmer outside so I thought that might be why she was outside so much. Once the two of you went to bed I headed outside to find her. She was panting and shaking in a corner of the backyard laying in the snow. :( When I walked over to her I knew it was grim. I tried to get her inside the house, but she wasn't moving. I went and got her some water and tried to get her up. Naturally, I had to go and get dad because if Mia doesn't want to move she isn't going to move. He got her up and helped her get inside. She made it to the chaise and was still trembling pretty badly. Not really knowing what to do I went to google. It became apparent that Mia was showing some end of life signs, but it said these can last for several hours or even days...I assumed she was at the beginning of a very long journey until we had to say goodbye or force a goodbye. Boy was I wrong...

I remember when I was in labor with Baby Waider. I was scared and didn't know what to do. I was alone because it was the middle of the night and dad was asleep. Then, Mia got up and climbed up on the couch and sat with me. I suddenly wasn't alone. I was googling things and I was determining that in fact this baby was trying to come out. No matter how scared I was Mia was right there beside me refusing to leave. She was so loyal and such a good companion. 

I decided that night as she was trembling and unable to sleep that I was going to pay it forward and give her the same comfort that she gave me while I was in labor. I read online that a dying dog may want space so I tried to leave her and come and check in. She was having more and more trouble breathing. I tried to convince her to have some ice cubes or pain meds. She wanted none of it and that was the only time she moved was to  turn her head away from the ice and dog treats. I was pretty sure that things were headed downhill. Out of nowhere for the first time in months the stupid OWL came back with his haunting hoot. It was a premonition to me that our dog was not long for this earth because that damn owl was outside taunting me, warning me. 

The owl was right. Mia waited for both dad and I to get up the next morning. It was about 5:45. Right as dad bent down to check on her Mia took her final breaths. It was devastatingly peaceful. The tragic end to our beautiful friendship. I wished more than anything at that very moment that I could will Mia back to life. 

During the night I briefly comforted Mia each time I got up to check on her or calm her when she was coughing too hard or when she was having a hard time breathing. I said many things to Mia during the night. Mostly that I loved her-we all loved her and it was okay for her to go. The one thing I didn't say that night was probably what I needed to say the most. Thank you. So here it is. My thank you note to the best dog we'll ever know. 

Dear Mia, 

Where do I even begin? You know you meant the world to all of us. There wasn't a day that went by that I wasn't grateful for you. You were a ray of sunshine in each day. 

Thank you for always loving me even when I wasn't so lovable. Thank you for making me get out and walk. No matter what. Especially during younger days and thank you for not letting us be sedentary during your older years because of your constant need to go in and out. I still keep waiting to hear you scratch on the door to be let in or let out. I keep waiting to hear you clomp your way up the ramp. 

Thank you for always making us laugh. Whether it was when you would lay down with a hurummmf that simultaneously sounded like a bag of bones hitting the ground or sneaking food off of the table your disposition was second to none. I always said you could have been a sitcom dog because you were so funny and obedient. You did so many funny things. The most recent being one night two weeks ago when you decided you weren't going to sleep at 2AM. I let you out into the subzero weather and you were actually frolicking in the snow! Running around and having the time of your life. It was not so funny when I had to go out and remind you that you needed to come in. You brought us so much JOY.

Thank you for your compassion. It didn't matter if it was a kitten or a baby you were a gentle giant. You never nipped at my babies and the only time you got after the kittens were when then went after your bone. 

Thank you for your protection. You had an amazing presence  People were often intimidated by your size. If they weren't, your bark was enough to warn anyone to keep their distance. I never felt unsafe on a walk or a hike with you by my side or by the stroller. As long as you were with us I never felt unsafe in the house. 

Thank you for waking me up each morning. I know I wasn't always kind when you would come and breathe heavily in my face, but the past three mornings you haven't done this have made me wake up feeling alone and broken-hearted. I have no idea how to start my day without you there. You were who I shared my morning coffee with, usually while I let you in and out. Everyone was asleep and we would just chill. 

Thank you for living long enough to show my kids what an amazing family dog should be like. Thank you for loving my babies and letting them torment you. 

Thank you for dying at home. I've been telling you for the past year that We've been good to you so don't you make us make a decision about you dying. I hope it didn't offend you when we'd play sleeping or dead. Sometimes you did look like you were dead when you were sleeping. My hope for you was that we would wake up one day and you would look asleep, but you would be dead. It wasn't too far off. Adam got up and you were still struggling. He bent down to be with you and see what was going on. You took your last breath. After that you were gone. Thank you for making the decision to leave on your own because that's a decision I never wanted to make for you. Further proof that you were the most loyal dog we could have asked for. You actually waited for both of us to be able to say goodbye. I just wish in those last moments I would have said, "Thank you. Thank you for being more than I ever deserved." I love you Mia and you will always be in my heart. 

Love, 

Your Dogmom 

Teacher Appreciation

Dear Baby Waider + Little Brother Too,

We are just wrapping up teacher appreciation week. I've always had an interesting relationship with teacher appreciation week. On the one hand I think it's weird to be appreciated for a job I'm paid to do essentially by the people who pay me with their tax dollars to do said job. So often I find that parents are gushing over what I just do, like teach their child to read or get better at math. They often act like I've given their child a million dollars or a free new car! I don't know. It's never felt right to me. The parents gushing and so grateful when I'm just doing what I love. I would not object to being paid more to do the job I love, but that's probably for another blog entry.

When I started teaching I was probably 5 years old. I had been to school one day and I'm pretty sure I started teaching the world ever since. I loved the rhythm of school and I had two younger siblings and a host of daycare kids so teaching came very naturally to me. I was 22 years old when Dan Olson hired me to teach third grade. I was about as green as you could get, but I was so excited. I couldn't wait to have my own classroom. I can honestly say I loved my job. For eighteen years I've loved my job. There have been very few days that I have thought I might want to do something else with my life. 

Throughout my career I've had moments of contention with parents or other teaches where I have had differing opinions. So often these conversations ended with, "You just wait until you're a mom. Then you'll understand." 

"When you have a kid of your own you'll understand what it's like."

"I don't care who my kid has for a teacher next year, but I want it to be someone who has kids because they just understand kids better." 

These conversations would enrage me. I would cry for hours over not feeling validated as a person who could handle or teach children because I didn't have any of my own. As horrible as it sounds I always wanted to be a teacher, but I never really saw myself as a mom. I think that's why these comments were so devastating. 

Alas, I made the decision to become a mom and while delivering the two of you did very little to enhance my ability to teach. In fact it made me so tired I think it was more of a hinderance. What it did give me perspective. The perspective didn't hit until this week. Teacher appreciation week. A week that has always been a little odd to me. It was this week that I finally understood parents gushing over what I've done for their child. 

Enter my baby going to school. First, I'm always in awe of kindergarten teachers and their ability to transform a group of rowdy five year olds into school-rule abiding six year old students.I've worked with Mrs. Salter for a few years now and she has always amazed me. I knew her mostly from seeing her in the hallway being the perfect kindergarten teacher. I was so excited for Baby Waider to have her because cousin Finn had her and he loved her class. So, I sent my little girl, a piece of my heart, to Mrs. Salter. Baby Waider didn't really know her letters too well, sounds, or how to spell, or write. She wasn't even very interested in learning...In just eight short months Mrs. Salter transformed Baby Waider into a reading, writing, counting, and math machine. I have never been more grateful in my life for an individual than I am for Mrs. Salter. My child loves school. She loves to learn, read, write, and complete any variety of tasks related to school. Mrs. Salter has treated my child with compassion, concern, set limits, and taught her to be a better person. She has willingly helped her overcome challenges, and encouraged her when she needed an extra push all while wrangling and teaching 19 other children. The value of that is not lost on me. I will forever be grateful for Mrs. Salter's contribution to my child's life. To me Superman's got nothing on Mrs. Salter. She's a superhero. 

So while becoming a parent didn't give me a greater understanding of bad behavior, parenting without limits, refusal to believe my child does anything wrong, or a need to make excuses for children, it has changed one thing for me. It has given me a much greater appreciation for the extreme importance of our job. Each person in my class is someone's heart. My job is to make sure that child learns, loves school, and strives to be a good person. So I probably won't be telling anyone anytime soon that they will gain anything as a teacher when they become a parent except less sleep. But what I will continue to do is teach my heart out so that I can be to each child in my class what Mrs. Salter was to my child. Thank you to all teachers, but mostly thank you, Mrs. Salter. Also, the next time a parent thanks me profusely for being a part of their child's life I will totally get it. 

Love always, 

Mama  

Goodbye Peyton

Dear Baby Waider + Little Brother Too,

Today was a day that every teacher dreads. The principal coming to your room and telling you that one of the students in your school has passed away. We had the meeting after school and are prepared to address any students who may experience sadness from this. As much of a nightmare is this is at school this loss was particularly heart-breaking on a personal level for the Waiders. Peyton was a fourth grader at our school, PVE. But she was also a former "daycare kid" from Nancy's (Grandma's house). She was really one of Baby Waider's first friends and helped take care of her when she was a tiny baby. We were so excited when Peyton transferred to PVE from Grandview when she was in first grade. It was so nice to have her at school. She was always stopping by and giving a friendly greeting. In second grade she had my amazing friend, Miss Grimm, as her teacher. That year we did a lot together as a grade level so I had the opportunity to do activities with Peyton. Grandma Halter always raved about what an amazing helper Peyton was and that she was amazing in general. We were not disappointed when she was in second grade. She really was amazing. This year was Baby Waider's first year at the school and Peyton was always stopping by to say good morning and even walk the timid Baby Waider outside. 

Naturally, we were all shocked to learn that the leg pain Peyton had begun to complain about was in fact an aggressive form of cancer and that she would be leaving school to go to live in Minneapolis for treatment. It was completely out of the blue. We couldn't say goodbye she just had to go so quickly. Obviously there were lots of questions with no answers. Baby Waider likely didn't know the last time she saw Peyton was the last time. I know the last time I saw Peyton. She came to school. I didn't give her a hug because she was busy talking with her classmates and smiling. I am so grateful that Aunt Katie told me that she was at school so I could greet her. 

Peyton was an inspiring girl and I'm so saddened by her death. Today when I was feeling so devastated I knew I needed to do two things. Look at pictures and get my thoughts into writing. When something happens to me, good, bad, or exciting I get attacked with memories and sometimes the best thing I can do is put the memories down in words. It's almost as if I am so terrified that I won't remember that the memories stick with me over and over again. 

Before even looking at pictures from birthday parties I instantly thought of my strongest Peyton memory. Baby Waider was tiny. Maybe four months. I was a new mom and feeling pretty sad about my baby being in daycare all day. I was terrified to miss anything. Well, one day I walked in to do pick up and Peyton runs up to me and says, "Carol! Guess what? Ellie rolled over today." 

Grandma responds, "Peyton! Remember we weren't going to tell her right when she walked in! We were going to show her!" I couldn't even be a little disappointed after looking at the huge toothy grin and how happy she was to convey to me Baby Waider's new skills. 

I am obviously obsessed with pictures. This is no surprise. The reason I'm so obsessed is that they really tell a story otherwise forgotten. As I went through the pictures I was reminded of Peyton's attendance to Baby Waider's first birthday party. I remembered that Peyton was hanging out and running and playing with the kids, but once I looked at the photos again I had forgotten what a little mother hen she was to Baby Waider, Harry, Finn, and maybe even Vern a little. She was holding hands, helping to open presents, and helping with crafts. All with the most gigantic grin on her face. I studied the pictures of the gift opening and Peyton was right by me watching intently and even helping Baby Waider with some of the presents. She was just so darn precious. She was celebrating bringing Baby Waider from infant to toddler just like dad, grandma, and me. 

The next set of pictures I found were from Little Brother's second birthday. We had decided to invite Carter because he is Little Brother's BEST FRIEND. He says this all the time. I wasn't sure that Peyton or Hailey would want to come to the party because the kids were so little and it was at Old McDonald's Farm. I decided to invite them both and ask them to help which was a GENIUS idea. Flipping though pictures it is clear that Peyton was helping an overly sad Benny the entire time. She was so darn helpful. She did what needed to be done before you needed it to be done.She happily rode on the train just so that Cousin Kitt could. She tried to help Little Brother who couldn't stop crying during the group picture from his party.  

Telling you this news, Baby Waider, was so difficult. You were sad, mad, and had so many difficult questions. We did our best to help you by answering your questions, but the truth is we don't really know the answers either. You will both remember Peyton and she will forever live in our hearts. Today was a harsh reality that life isn't fair and it can even be cruel. No matter how many fundraisers we participated in, t-shirts we bought, or prayers we sent Peyton still died today. The tragedy of that is not lost on me. 

I will never forget how amazing Peyton was with both of my babies. She made both of their lives better by being in it. I will remember her for her infectious smile, helpful nature, and genuine love for life. Today was a reminder to live life to the fullest and never take a moment for granted. 

Love,

Mama

Family Tradition

Dear Baby Waider + Little Brother Too,

We have an end of the summer family tradition. I have a love/hate relationship with this tradition. This tradition is The Central States Fair. Things I hate about the fair: Everything appears to be covered in germs, the equipment doesn't appear to be the least bit safe, and the people there are...Well I don't want to seem judgy, but it is a colorful crowd. Things I love about the fair: cream puffs, the smiles on your faces, and the faces of your cousins. 

This year The Central States Fair fell after we had experienced a wonderful summer of travel and right before Baby Waider was going to enter kindergarten with Cousin Harry. While the two events are unrelated I noticed just how much older Baby Waider was at the fair than last year. This was probably the last year on the "baby rides" that just go around in a little circle in several different varieties. While the cousins seemed so much older Cousin Harry and Baby Waider were still young enough to walk around the fairgrounds hand in hand. Undoubtably something that they won't do next year. 

It's these yearly events that really remind us of how quickly time is passing. I'm equal parts sad and happy think about how far you both will have come in the next year. 

The fair was pretty typical this year. You all riding as many rides as quickly as possible. We did shake it up by playing the goldfish game. Note: Grandma and Grandpa had you play the goldfish game. Turns out you two were crack shots and we won 6 or 7 goldfish!! It was impressive. Many people complain that those fish don't last, but we still have two of them and the neighbor kid has three that we gave him. A couple did die, but overall they are flourishing with Spikey. 

One part of the Central States Fair that I failed to mention is that I went when I was a little girl. I got to go with my siblings and my cousin Kammie. I remember being sweaty and flushed with excitement after going around and around in circles for hours. I remember the beautiful warm August Summer nights and the fait scent of dust and and Rapid Creek in the air. Even though it isn't my favorite event and every part of my being wants to hate it I have to admit that I probably won't ever not go. There's just something uniquely American about going to the county fair. 

Love, 

Mama

Total Eclipse of the Heart

Dear Baby Waider + Little Brother Too,

Last summer I remember Grandma Halter trying to plan with me to go to see the total solar eclipse in Alliance, Nebraska. I was pretty reluctant to get excited because we would have just returned from Yellowstone, Colorado, and a summer of lots of travel. Dad had to work and it just didn't seem that excited. Boy was I wrong. We decided to go, invited a good friend of mine, Mrs. Kvanvig, got up at 5:00AM and headed south. We hit horrible fog on the way there. The skis were very cloudy and the trip really seemed like a waste. Despite the fact that we saw two birds fighting and a coyote the drive was pretty uneventful. 

We paid to park in an open field where the owners sold a few souvenirs. It was a pretty small group of people and not at all crowded which was very cool. We went with Grandma and Grandpa Halter, Jannette, Kiani, Calvin, Uncle Kelly, Aunt April, Harry, Vern, Franklin, and Finn. It was a total blast. We had "sun" inspired treats like Sun Chips, Sunkist, and Sunny D. 

*I feel like I initially forgot to mention why the title Total Eclipse of the Heart. It was a song from the 1980s that I pretty much continually played/sang for you the entire day. It was amazing. You can YouTube the song yourself if you want to be reminded of its awesomeness. 

 This video is from the time of the total eclipse. Hands down the most amazing thing I've ever seen. I will travel many miles to see it again. The 360 degrees of sunset was just amazing. I don't know if you will remember the experience, but it was completely amazing, creepy, and breathtaking. 

 Eerie mid-day sunset.

Fun waiting for the event. It was so cool and such a big deal. So glad Grandma Halter made us go.The only thing that would have made it better would have been dad being able to see the eclipse too.

Love, 

Mom

Wanderlust

Dear Baby Waider + Little Brother Too,

Long before I knew of the world "wanderlust" it was something I felt. The word means, "a strong desire to travel." I've felt this especially the past 20 years. It is also true that I am an extreme homebody and often right after I leave my house I long to go home. What can I say? It's not the only time I'm a contradiction of terms. 

As I've conveyed through previous posts I have always loved to travel and go on adventures. Your Aunt Katie and I went on a good many road trips and saw some amazing things. I also went lots of cool places with Grandma and Grandpa Halter. However, once I met your dad I really began to have the opportunity to travel. We love to go on adventures and it was something that was very important for us to pass down to you two. Today I am feeling pretty reflective upon our journeys from last summer along with the hope of some travel this coming summer. I also could just be sad that I've been cold for what seems like three months straight so that has me longing for summer in general. We took three pretty significant trips last summer. The North Dakota Badlands, The Great Sand Dunes, and Yellowstone all in one summer. The actual stats of our summer travel was approximately 3500 miles, camped for 25 nights, went to 6 states, 3 national parks, and made about a billion memories. 

Here's a breakdown in pictures and a few anecdotes. 

Badlands

I love to chase sunsets. It's generally the first thing I like to do in a new park. In fact I scour the park newspaper for a good place to view sunsets. This is where the park paper sent us. It is called the Wind Canyon Trail and it was magnificent. We also had an amazing drive up to Medora because you traveled like troopers and did not even get on a device once! You loved your activity books and snoozes. 

 Sunset views:
 This quote was amazing in the visitor's center. It really spoke to me in light of current events. 

We also went to Medora. It was an absolute HOOT! We loved everything about it. We got to eat a fun dinner before and watched a fantastic show. We will definitely be going back again soon. 

 The day after Medora dad had to work so we took some time to tour the town on our bikes. It was HOT, but we managed to have some taffy, ice cream, shopping, and FUN! We took the loop on the way back once dad met back up with us and you both fell fast asleep!

 The purpose of going to North Dakota was meeting up with the Harringtons so they could pick up their camper. We went to Buffalo River State Park where we had quite an interesting encounter. After a long day of travel and trying to get to the Harringtons in time we arrived at the campsite to find someone in our spot. We could not locate the guy who took our spot so we ended up having to move the next day so we could have the correct spot. It was a little bit of a rocky start for the Harringtons, but we ended up having fun and loved hanging out in Fargo at the giant, indoor ferris wheel, geocaching, hiking, and hiding out from HUGE North Dakota thunderstorms. 

April, Grandma, and Grandpa met us in Aberdeen where we went to Storybook Land and stayed at beautiful Richmond Lake. Storybook Land was AMAZING. We loved the references to the Wizard of OZ and generally had a blast. 

 Fortunately we caught a beautiful sunset! Richmond Lake really was a slice of heaven. 

The Great Sand Dunes:

 The Great Sand Dunes are arguably the most amazing place I've ever been. We hiked, hiked, and hiked, and obviously took pictures of the dunes.

 Enjoying the sunshine with my girl. 

 Unbelievable views.

 We experienced pretty much everything that The Great Sand Dunes had to offer including a trip up to Zapata Falls. Of everything it was probably the most difficult hike and the most underwhelming. But we had an adventure nonetheless. 

 Probably our biggest accomplishment was tackling Great Dune. A 650 ft. hike and you were troopers. It was worth the hike and the view was completely amazing. 

 Pointing to where we were. 

Finally we have some accomplishments of the trip. Both of you  became junior rangers, we took in incredible views, and took some amazing hikes!

No trip is without learning a few lessons. This trip was full of lessons. Let me list them. 

1. Leave on time. That means if you plan to leave by 5:00 AM you need to be out the door at 5:00AM. Not 9:00AM. Otherwise you will arrive to your destination when it is dark. That means that you could accidentally back into a tree and put a giant hole in your camper and push the fridge into the kitchen. Also, by the time you get to your campground you could have yet another person in your spot. Yes. If you're wondering this did happen to us. Yes we were both very grouchy about it. But we did learn the importance of leaving on time.

Here's our camper all bandaged up. 

2. BE SPONTANEOUS! We had a tight plan where we went from The Great Sand Dunes to Denver and then to Rocky Mountain National Park. Once we had a giant hole in the back of our camper we decided it would be best if we stuck around the dunes a little longer and skipped all of the other travel. Plus lots of rain was predicted for the Rocky Mountains and the risk didn't seem worth it since we'd been there a year before. We ended up having the most relaxing and rejuvenating time there. Sometimes it pays to slow down and enjoy the view. 

3. Don't travel at night. Ever. We stopped by Denver on our way home from The Sand Dunes. We did some shopping and ate lunch before we headed back up north. Unfortunately we were on the road after dark and the trailer lights stopped working. On a road that we couldn't stop on. In the middle of Nebraska. It was pretty unnerving. I could tell even dad was getting a tad nervous. Thankfully we made it to Chadron, got some gas, and dad did some problem solving that got the lights working again. I will say this. Your dad is a genius. He really can fix anything on the fly, but if you can read this you already know that. We made it home super late, but we made it home. 

Yellowstone:
I think I've told the story before that my love for National Parks started with Yellowstone. Grandpa and Grandma Halter took us when I was maybe 10 or 11? I can't exactly remember, but it was amazing and this summer I am fairly certain that you, Finn, and Kitt all loved the mysterious place full of geysers, mud pots, wild animals, and that huge lake. 

 This hike was awesome. It was on an old road to what was called the Natural Bridge.

 Beautiful morning at Fishing Bridge.

 The pictures are out of order in this, but Yellowstone is a place full of beauty and mystery, but also extreme danger. There are giant mammals like the grizzly bear that was actually around a trail so they had to close the trail down. There are also tons of buffalo that people will not stay away from. Pair that with scalding water, looming cliffs, and rushing water it is a little terrifying to bring your children there. That being said we only had one pretty significant brush with danger and that was on the hike to Lone Star Geyser. 

 As I've mentioned before each trip teaches you a lesson. The big lesson for this trip: Don't hike at high elevations late in the afternoon. We already knew this, but we still left a bit too late on our hike to see Lone Star Geyser. It was such a beautiful morning we never would have suspected a thunderstorm complete with hail and heavy rain shortly after we ate lunch. Thankfully we had a thermal sun blanket (not sure that's what it's called) and towels that we could build a shelter of sorts from. We all huddled under the shelter we built for what seemed like a long time. Once the storm past the geyser went off and wasn't too impressive. The hike and the experience was pretty impressive. Another thunderstorm was behind that one so we had to run most of the two miles back to the truck. Lauryn was the unsung hero of that trip because she set a fast pace we all followed and made it back safely. 

 I loved this trip because Aunt Katie and her family were able to come. It was so much fun to be on an adventure with her and her family now that we're all grown up. 

We got to chase a sunset at Yellowstone Lake our first night there. 

 So many cool things to see and do! We got to watch the sunrise over the mountains pretty much every day. 

 Another sunset.

Travel can be really fun, but it can also be really stressful. These trips taught me that no matter how much you plan, make an itinerary, read books, and prepare no trip is going to be perfect. Sometimes the magic is in the mess ups and the mistakes. 

I am already so excited for camping and adventures this summer. I can hardly wait. The best part is you're excited too. <3

Love, 
Mom

😂

Why We March

Dear Baby Waider+Little Brother Too,

I am so disappointed with my lack of blogging for 2017 and the first quarter of 2018. I have been trying to evaluate why I don't blog as much as I did when you were babies and the most simplistic answer I have is that you both nap less than you used to. I used to be able to crank out some blogs when you were sleeping. My computer has been drama since last spring and I'm just getting it back to working condition.  Also, I feel like the past year has been marred by atrocious political events. I remember an earlier blog that I wrote that I was devastated that Barack Obama was leaving office. I had so many thoughts and  opinions about what it would be like once he left office and I will tell you that I had no idea how bad it would really get. I feel like I spend so much time on social media and google trying to find some glimmer of hope that things are going to change and get better, but the reality is that we are all just waiting for the 2018 election in November. I need to snap out of this media funk I've been in and start documenting the great things we're doing as a family!

Today I decided to bring back the blog because you have become quite the little activists. We participated in the March for our Lives event today that focused upon the need for gun reform in the United States. This comes from events where students are shot in their schools by semi-automatic weapons. This didn't happen when mom and dad were little. For both of you it will be a reality you've always known. You will always have participated in active shooter drills at your school. For whatever reason guns have become easy for crazy people to get and for reasons I don't understand they go into schools with the intent to harm innocent children and teachers. Today we marched because of the need to regulate the types of guns and ammo that people can buy. Today we marched because we don't feel that one more person should die by a gun. It was a chilly morning and we went to the park first, but I was totally impressed by your marching without complaint. 

Here are some pictures from today... 

There are a whole bunch of people who are opposed to changing the gun laws and we ran into some of them today. One guy shouted at us from his motorcycle, "You are manipulating the minds of children with your beliefs. You are rotten people." Based upon what I'm seeing on social media he wasn't the only person to feel this way. It confuses me because he's not the one who has to practice active shooter drills in his school and worry about someone coming in to shoot at him for no reason. There were lots of kids participating in marches today, not just you. Some were older and some were speaking out. I am so proud of you both today. You are living during a time where you will really know what it means to bring about change. You will know the importance of voting and being civically active. I was always involved in politics because my mom and dad were involved. I am so grateful for Grandpa and Grandma Halter for that and I vow to pass that onto you. 

We also participated in the Women's March back in January which both of you loved. You had the time of your life shouting, "Hey! Hey! Ho! Ho! Donald Trump has got to go!" We marched with Grandma Halter, Becky, Joe, April, Liz, and Franklin. Unfortunately you got into a fist fight in the middle of the speeches which was a little unnerving because we were at a peaceful march and you were punching each other out. I think I said the words, "You can't get into a fist fight at a peaceful march." The march was moving and having the two of you there was everything. 

Today cousin Vern asked why we were marching and I'm sure that was on your minds as well. We march because we are in a situation where everything we hold dear is being trivialized and taken away. Everything that was fought for is slowly being lost. We march because we want better for you. We had you during a time of hope. Unfortunately that quickly turned to a time of hate. I know that it won't stay like this, but I hope you remember these times when we took a stand and marched. I hope you know that you can always stand up for what you believe and be involved in our political process.

I'll tell ya one thing. When I was a kid I would have NEVER imagined this many Democrats in ALL of South Dakota let alone in Rapid City. That's a gross assumption that everyone was a Democrat. I should rephrase that as like-minded people. Today and the Women's March gave me great hope. In quoting Barack Obama, "We're fired up! Ready to go!" Here's to hoping a little flame has been lit in both of you. 

Love, 

Mom